why 2009/2012

I create art because there is some driving force deep within my body that requires it. I do it to maintain.

When I was young I fell in love with photography. The concept of capturing a single moment and preserving it in the form of a photo mesmerized me. This was during the few years of my life when analog was the only option, glorifying the process behind the photo. As I went through school I always enjoyed and performed well in art classes, but never really thought of myself as skilled in anything other than photography. Because my school didn’t offer anything in photography or digital production I was forced to take classes in other media. This was very beneficial for me because it created a greater appreciation for art as a whole and cemented my decision to study art after graduation.

            I came to The University of Colorado with a desire to study photography, but also with the pressure of my dad to study something “worth while” with economical opportunities in the near future. None of that “sandbox bullshit.” I didn’t declare a major and spent my first semester in 15 credit hours of mass-communication pre-requisite class. After months of school I found myself outside the library, too tired for caffeine to work, sucking down cigarettes as a reward for 4 hours of reading, and a break before another four. Tired, bored, unhealthy. Unhappy. This was just the first semester, and I was already about to loose it. The next day I met with my advisor and made the necessary arrangements to change my major to studio arts right before the end of the first semester. A huge step, however, I had acted too late and was not able to register for any classes.

            The next year I officially began my higher education in art, and I began to feel good about going to school. I enjoyed class, homework, my teachers, everything about it. For the entire year I was assigned projects in the different formal backgrounds within art. I was allowed and encouraged to explore new ideas and express myself in more complex ways than before. Once I began producing art, it became a necessity. I found that although I didn’t necessarily want to be a painter I thoroughly enjoyed doing it, and being critiqued on my work. Foundations class inspired me to continue exploring different media and not focus only on photography.

             I knew when I was younger I wanted to become a photographer professionally some day. I figured I would go to college study advertising, minor in photography and find a job where I could combine the two areas. After being exposed to the faculty and students at CU I realized what art has to offer, and how important it is to my life. I have transformed from a kid capturing nature with a damaged 1979 Nikon FM, to a growing artist exploring and producing art in a variety of media. I am dedicated to my art. I love what I do. This is what I will do with my life.

            My time at CU has proven to me that this is where I belong. Being exposed to inspiring faculty has brought out the artist in me, and set me on the path to creating better work. I am confident in my decision and am willing to make sacrifices in life to live it out. A thousand times over I would choose to be a starving artist, rather than a fat business man, as long as it makes me happy. I don’t want to do art to be cool or different. I do art for me. It is self-enriching, and has made me a better person.

            After my time at CU I plan to spend a year at Metro State in Denver, where I can become certified to teach art in public schools. This will act as my back up plan. I believe that graduate school is in the future somewhere, but I have made few plans as of now. For now I am going to live it, and let it take me as far as possible. I am confident I can live a pleasing life through art, and if not I am going to probably become a hermit and live off the land deep in the woods of the Rocky Mountains.

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             Two and a half years later I sit in my childhood bedroom in my parents’ house in Aspen; reviewing past work, gathering portfolios, writing letters of intent, and preparing for the mission that lies ahead. Metro State is an idea of the past, and is indefinitely out of the picture for now. Instead I plan to return to school and get a Masters in Fine Arts, focusing in installation, sound art, and digital media. I still desire to teach, however I find it more important to continue my studies, becoming the artist I have desired to be for so long. In my final years at The University of Colorado I was lucky enough to meet Dr. George Rivera (Dr. Tsonik), who took me under his wing and introduced me to the vast world of sound art, expanding my notions of what art is and can be.

Through extensive research, collaborations, performances, conversations, live concert experiences, and most recently the burning man festival, I have found a niche within the fine art world where I feel comfortable, and can utilize all the various media I have become accustomed to working with, allowing me to truly express the ideas and messages I find important. This exists in, but is not limited to, two main forms, large-scale installations, and live audio/visual performances. Installations are a way to integrate sculptural forms and architectural spaces, combined with light, sound, and motion to create an interactive sensorial experience, which the viewer can derive many different personal interpretations and emotions from. In a very similar way, experimental noise rock paired with live visuals create a combination of visual and auditory information that can have a much deeper effect than traditional art forms. The main difference between the two being the ephemeral nature, and social interaction and context inherit in each. Audio/visual performances allow for a group to come together, creating a shared experience limited by duration, while installations allow room for solitude and deep personal interpretation.

This is all just a starting point, a place to jump off and see where I land. The past year, and the year that lies ahead, have been set aside from academics as a time for exploration, research, and most importantly personal reflection. I have been searching for my voice as well as my mountaintop to shout from, and though it is not entirely evident as of now all signs have pointed me in this direction. So now I gaze towards the sun, just above the horizon with excitement, love, and intent, and smile for what the future holds and each step of the journey ahead.